Fullness

Where do I start?

At the part where the fullness is?

Him

My heart (literal) hurts today and I believe that it is you 

because the last time pain was there it was you too or you two

My craving makes me use new tactics to get past it.

This feeling of hurt, loss, regret, grief, love 

but between you and me now it feels like there is not enough

Space, time, continuum, continuity or priority since each morning when I wake your thought is still here with me

Your clove oil lingers 113 days past, so my couch no longer comforts me, it reminds me of the last

Time that I held you, rubbing your eyes while hearing your heart

And that memory makes it nonsensical that we have been apart

This long

I have suffered losses but to feel I’ve lost myself

To think I’m someone else

To exist knowing that I reject myself daily

And may continue

since the status quo satisfies you

INDEED

WE change what WE cannot stand

So I try to understand how WE ended up here

Disappointed in ourselves for the mess we made of US and instead of cleaning it up 

WE just