The DL

So every black woman I know including myself was extremely alarmed when J.L. King went on Oprah, telling all women to beware of men "On the Down Low". At least six women sent me emails about it, one supposedly written by a man who liked to have sex with men but wanted to be in love with women. With all of this talk about it, I decided to read the book, "On the Down Low."

I'm 72 pages in and I grow more fascinated by this book every time I pick it up. Having known a few men on the Down Low myself I found it very interesting that when I picked up the book and saw J.L. King on the cover, he looked very "On the Down Low" to me. But that's a whole other topic. This book is crazy, dead on, but crazy. So far I have read about how he got caught by his wife and how women shouldn't blame themeselves when their men sleep with other men.

He's telling the truth but , gosh, I think if it were me I'd blame myself a little. With all of the flagrantly gay men that I know, if I ended up with a "Down Low" brother because I forgot to run a background check with them, I'd definitely blame myself. Now if he happened to surpass their alleged "gaydar" then I think I'd blame them. Maybe they need to tune up their gaydar. I'm just kidding. I wouldn't think it was my fault because I don't think women have the power to make any man that doesn't want to be with a man, be with a man. I would definitely blame the "Down Low Brother" because I fully believe in announcing all your issues when you enter a relationship.

If you're crazy, you're supposed to say it. Shoot, I say it, to friends and love interests alike. "I'm crazy, Are you okay with that?". That may explain my lack of both but hey, everyone who stayed got the disclaimer. So if I'm dating a man who's gay, bisexual, "On the Down Low", "On the Up High" or whatever else there is on this planet to be; somewhere near the beginning or our relationship he is supposed to say to me, "Tiffany, we have a heterosexual relationship but (whatever his issue is)." I mean let me know, so that I can make my informed decision about our relationship.

There's nothing I hate worse then not having all the information and there's noone I despise more than someone who manipulated me by denying me that. I'm not one of those girls who asks question she doesn't really want to hear the answer to.
Some Examples:
Girl: Do you love me?
Guy:No, I just want to play with your emotions.

Girl: Do I look fat?
Guy: Of course, you weigh 300 pounds.

Girl: Do you think she's prettier than me?
Guy: Look at her, now look at yourself. Are you really asking me this, you troll?

So to all the men who ever plan on dating me, just tell me the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth because if I ask a question I'm prepared for any answer you could give and if you lie the fury I unleash when I find out the truth will be worse than you ever imagined.